Becoming Content with Reality in Your Home

Just once in my life, for a few short months, I actually caught up on all of my projects around my home.

Every last to-do on my ongoing list was finished. All my photos were organized. All belongings were culled, sorted, and in their proper places. All craft projects were complete. I had time to sit in my living room and wonder, “Hmmm … what should I do next?”

Before you think this superhuman feat is something I might repeat at any time, I have a few clarifications to make:

My husband worked nights, so I had plenty of alone time to work around my home after I worked my daytime, full-time job.
We weren’t parents.
We lived in a tiny two-bedroom apartment with no yard.

But about two months after I finished everything, my husband and I bought our first house and my cleaning and household tasks multiplied and I’ve felt like I’ve been behind ever since.

Two cleaning extremes

When you find enough time to finally clean your home, it’s so easy to swing one of two ways – either obsessing over a clean home, or shrugging it off by figuring that keeping it clean will never be possible.

When we obsess over a clean home, it can be easy to measure our home against perfection. If your home isn’t perfectly clean all the time, it’s so easy to feel defeated.

If you try to maintain a “perfect” home, keeping up around the house ends up feeling like a weight. Since our homes never will be perfect, something always needs to be done. (Just think of your laundry. The minute you think you’re all caught up, just look at the clothes you’re wearing … it’s a reminder that laundry is never finished.)

At the opposite end of the spectrum, you may feel like keeping up with housework is futile since there’s always something that needs to be done. Instead of making cleaning a priority, it’s easy to try to forget about it until your house becomes a total mess. Then, when it looks too difficult to clean, you procrastinate more. And the mess just spirals out of control.

Of course, your own cleaning preference is unique. But you need to remind yourself that it’s simply a preference – nothing set in stone. So, if you’re going through a particularly trying season of life and simply don’t have the time or energy or desire to keep you home as clean as you’d like, it’s okay. Step back and give yourself some grace. But if everything seems to be going swimmingly and you can keep up with your cleaning, that’s okay, too!

In the middle of this delicate balance, you can choose to embrace and even become content with reality in your home.

Figuring Out Your Own Process

Once your cleaning chores become a little more automatic thanks to your strategy, watch what’s creating cleaning problems in your home. When you do notice a problem, work on figuring out a way that you can tackle the issue.

In case you’re feeling a little overwhelmed by knowing all of the chores that need to be done, relax. Remember that an important part of this process is figuring out when to fit everything in so that homemaking doesn’t have to be so overwhelming.

But once you’ve figured out when to fit everything in, the hard work starts. I have a bad news/good news situation for you:

The bad news is that the housework won’t get done on its own. You’ll need to do it. And you’ll need to find the motivation and energy to do it.

But the good news is you know what you need to clean. You know when you can clean it. You don’t have to wonder anymore. You should have a good plan in place. This is a lot like getting in shape or losing weight … you may know what you need to do, but unless you do the hard work of exercise and eating right, you won’t see any results.

Giving Yourself Grace

It’s fantastic to realize that you do need to work around your home at some point. But if you can’t work as much as you’d like, or if your home is messier than you’d prefer, exhale. It’s not the end of the world.

If a messy house stresses you out, it’s important to keep tweaking your plan of attack and approach to cleaning. But in the meantime, be sure to give yourself a healthy dose of grace. In most cases, you’ll be fine. While you may want your home to be cleaner, it might be a nice goal … but something that doesn’t really matter so much in the long run.

Sometimes, a relatively clean home is not so important. Living life and sharing time with others has a lot more value than choosing to stay home and maintain a spotless home.

If you’re thinking about your messy home right now, you might think the stress could cause anxiety or larger health problems. Because of that, it really is worth your time and energy to get things in order. Let your neat and tidy home fill your life with peace and calm.

Finding a Healthy Balance

As you find a healthy balance between loving and hating cleaning, remember to make the most of life. Try to simplify tasks around your home. But above all, think about what you’ll be remembered by – or what you want to think about on your deathbed someday. Is a clean home at the top of your list? Probably not. When you consider those aspects, a clean home doesn’t matter all that much.

In your quest for a peaceful haven, though, you don’t need to obsess over an immaculately clean house. Instead, make sure to do a lot of living and find a way to enjoy your home sweet home.

For more homemaking help, grab my free 7-Day Strategy to Tidy Your Home.

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Hilary

Hilary Bernstein is a Christ follower, wife, homeschooling mama, and writer who believes every Christian woman can live with peace and purpose. She's happiest when she's hosting friends and family for dinner, going on date nights with her husband, singing along to the radio, traveling with her family, and spending cozy nights at home. The author of fifteen books,Hilary also is Women's Ministry Director at The Chapel in Green, Ohio.